Who are you? Keith Waters

What do you do?

I’m Pastor of New Connexions Free Church

Why would people know you?

I guess, mainly as a Church Minister in the High Barns area and also I work at the Isle of Ely Primary school

On a scale of 1-10 (10 highest) what do you rate your sense of humour?

If you ask me I’d say 10 out of 10, but my congregation might just groan…

Tell us a joke.

Why wouldn’t the fretful wigwam talk to the nervous tepee? Because they were two tents!

Give us at least five pet hates.

Bad manners, unnecessary bad language on TV or films, over development of lovely cities like Ely leaving suburbs with all housing and no real community facilities, journalism that’s Londoncentric, people who don’t control their animals

Is it time for Britain to abolish the Royal Family?

I value the Queen and the huge service she has given to the UK, Commonwealth and particularly her clear genuine faith

Brexit – in or out?

I thought out was right and still do, mainly because I believe the UK should have her own voice in the world and look to forge good relationships and positive influence internationally as well as on our own continent

What is your favourite thing about East Cambridgeshire?

It’s mainly rural and the sunrise is great.

If you won £5,000 what would you spend it on?

I’ve seen too much damage done to people with gambling, so it’s unlikely to happen, but as a church we’d love to see a real community building in the Barns/Kings Avenue area, to enable us as a church to serve our friends and neighbours more, so it would go straight to our building fund

Place you would never want to return to and why?

Morocco – not a great place for Christians, got food poisoning and the chase back to our hotel by the feral cats and dogs was legendary!

Which three people would you like to have dinner with?

Only three… wow. I’m assuming both dead and alive and so I’ll go for Van Morrison, Steve Biko and CS Lewis

Who was your childhood hero and why?

My Grandad, he had a great sense of humour, knew a lot, taught me a lot and loved a good bike ride.

Your claim to fame.

I have met the Duke of Edinburgh a number of times and also organised a few visits from him when I worked as Estates Manager for one of the Cambridge Colleges.

Biggest regret in life or biggest achievement?

As Frank Sinatra said, ‘regrets, I’ve had a few…’ I’m not a great one for ‘what if’s’, but I do regret ignoring the clear call I had to train as a Christian minister for a few years.

What character would dress as for a fancy dress party?

I guess the easiest would be the Rev. Green from ‘Cluedo’ or Basil Fawlty.

Would you like to take part, do you think you have a joke that is better than Keith’s? If so let us know why you would be good for this feature and we will get in touch. Email: sarah.cliss@archant.co.uk with your name and contact information.